On this page13 sections
- Quick picker
- Respect as height: looking up
- Respect as weight and size
- Respect as payment: earned, owed and paid
- Respect as a gesture
- Respect as space and boundaries
- Losing respect
- How these metaphors frame our values
- Respect as light and example
- Similes about respect
- Using respect metaphors in writing
- Practice
- Quick answers
Most metaphors for respect come from a handful of pictures. Height: we look up to people, hold them in high regard and put them on a pedestal, and we look down on those we don’t respect. Weight: a respected opinion carries weight and a respected person is a giant in their field. Payment: respect is earned, owed and paid. Gesture: hats off to someone, bow to their experience. Knowing which picture a phrase uses tells you what it implies: height suggests rank, weight suggests influence, payment suggests that respect must be deserved.
For what a metaphor is and how it differs from a simile, see the figurative language guide. This page sticks to respect.
Quick picker
| You want to say… | Use |
|---|---|
| I admire her as a role model | I look up to her |
| He’s widely respected | He’s held in high regard; he’s highly esteemed |
| His opinion matters | His opinion carries weight |
| She’s one of the greats in her field | She’s a giant / a towering figure in her field |
| Well done, I salute you | Hats off to you; I take my hat off to you |
| Respect has to be deserved | Respect is earned, not given |
| I admire him too much, uncritically | I put him on a pedestal |
| She lost everyone’s respect | She fell from grace; she was knocked off her pedestal |
| I’m visiting to honour the dead | I’m paying my respects |
| He has no respect for them | He looks down on them; he looks down his nose at them |
Respect as height: looking up
This is the biggest family. In their 1980 book Metaphors We Live By, the linguists George Lakoff and Mark Johnson pointed out that English treats status as up and lack of status as down: high rank, top people, low status, beneath contempt. Respect follows the same pattern.
| Metaphor | Meaning | Example |
|---|---|---|
| look up to someone | admire and respect them as an example | I’ve always looked up to my older sister. |
| hold someone in high regard / high esteem | respect them greatly (formal) | Dr Osei is held in high regard by her colleagues. |
| put someone on a pedestal | admire them so much you ignore their faults | Fans put the singer on a pedestal, then turned on her when she made one mistake. |
| a towering figure | a person of great importance and influence | Achebe is a towering figure in African literature. |
| stand tall | keep your dignity and self-respect | After the false accusation, she stood tall and kept working. |
| rise in someone’s estimation | gain their respect | He rose in my estimation when he admitted his mistake. |
| look down on someone | consider them inferior (the opposite) | Don’t look down on people because of the jobs they do. |
| beneath someone | not worthy of their dignity | She felt that answering the insult was beneath her. |
Watch the tone of put on a pedestal: it is usually a warning, not praise. It means admiration that is unrealistic, and pedestals are things people fall off. If you simply mean deep respect, “look up to” is better.
Respect as weight and size
| Metaphor | Meaning | Example |
|---|---|---|
| carry weight | be influential and respected (of opinions, names, words) | A recommendation from her carries a lot of weight. |
| a heavyweight | an important, respected person in a field | The conference drew some real heavyweights from economics. |
| a giant (of / in) | someone of great achievement | Marie Curie was a giant of science. |
| stand on the shoulders of giants | build on the work of respected people before you | Every researcher stands on the shoulders of giants. |
| big shoes to fill | a respected predecessor who is hard to replace | The new head teacher has big shoes to fill. |
| a lightweight | someone not taken seriously (the opposite) | Critics dismissed him as a political lightweight. |
“Standing on the shoulders of giants” is best known from a 1675 letter by Isaac Newton to Robert Hooke (“If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of Giants”), but Newton was borrowing an image that goes back to the twelfth-century scholar Bernard of Chartres. Using it signals respect for those who came before, and modesty about your own part.
Respect as payment: earned, owed and paid
This family frames respect as something of value that changes hands. It brings a moral idea with it: respect should be deserved, and it can be in debt.
| Metaphor | Meaning | Example |
|---|---|---|
| earn someone’s respect | deserve it through your actions | She earned the team’s respect by staying late with them. |
| respect is earned, not given | a saying: you must deserve respect | As a new manager, remember that respect is earned, not given. |
| command respect | naturally make people respect you | Her calm voice commands respect in any meeting. |
| owe someone respect | have a duty to respect them | Whatever you think of his policies, you owe him the respect of listening. |
| pay your respects | visit or honour someone, especially after a death | Hundreds came to pay their respects at the funeral. |
| pay tribute to | publicly praise and honour | The mayor paid tribute to the volunteers. |
| lose someone’s respect | stop being respected by them | He lost my respect when he blamed his assistant. |
“Pay your respects” today usually refers to death: attending a funeral, visiting a grave, or calling on a grieving family. In older English it could mean a polite formal visit to anyone, and you will still meet that sense in period novels. Be careful with it in ordinary modern settings, where it may sound like a condolence.
Respect as a gesture
Many respect phrases come from physical acts of deference: removing a hat, bowing, kneeling, saluting.
| Metaphor | Meaning | Example |
|---|---|---|
| hats off to / I take my hat off to | I admire and congratulate | Hats off to the organisers; that was a brilliant festival. |
| tip your hat to | give a small sign of respect or credit | The film tips its hat to the old Westerns. |
| bow to (someone’s experience) | accept their superior knowledge | I’ll bow to your experience on this one. |
| salute | honour publicly | We salute the nurses who worked through the crisis. |
| take a bow | accept deserved praise | The whole cast deserves to take a bow. |
| bend the knee | submit to someone’s authority (can suggest humiliation) | The rebels refused to bend the knee to the new king. |
“Bend the knee” is about submission rather than admiration. It suits fantasy, history and politics, not a thank-you note.
Respect as space and boundaries
- Give someone space: respect their need to be alone. “After the argument, I gave her some space.”
- Give someone the floor: let them speak without interruption. “Let’s give Ahmed the floor.”
- Respect someone’s boundaries: a metaphor of property lines for personal limits.
- Know your place: accept your (lower) position. Today it is usually critical or ironic: “They expected her to know her place.”
Two phrases listed on the old version of this page belong elsewhere. “Keep someone at arm’s length” means to avoid getting close, usually from distrust, not respect. “Give someone a wide berth” means to avoid them, often because they are unpleasant or dangerous. Using either to mean respect will confuse readers.
Losing respect
| Metaphor | Meaning | Example |
|---|---|---|
| fall from grace | lose a respected position, often through scandal | The minister’s fall from grace was sudden. |
| knock someone off their pedestal | show that an admired person has faults | The biography knocked the war hero off his pedestal. |
| lose face | be humiliated and lose others’ respect | He refused to back down because he didn’t want to lose face. |
| a tarnished reputation | respect damaged, like metal losing its shine | The scandal left the firm with a tarnished reputation. |
| drag someone’s name through the mud | damage someone’s reputation publicly | The tabloids dragged her name through the mud. |
“Lose face” came into English in the nineteenth century as a translation of a Chinese expression about public dignity. “Save face”, its partner, means to avoid humiliation.
How these metaphors frame our values
The picture behind a phrase is not neutral. It carries an idea about what respect is.
- Height ties respect to rank. “Look up to” and “look down on” assume a ladder, which is why they fit hierarchies and role models but can sound unequal.
- Payment ties respect to merit and duty. “Earn” says it must be deserved; “owe” says some respect is due to everyone regardless.
- Weight ties respect to influence. A heavyweight is respected because their words move things.
- Space ties respect to equality. “Giving someone space” or “respecting boundaries” is respect between equals, with no ladder at all.
A useful exercise for essays: when a debate is about whether respect must be earned or is owed to everyone, notice which metaphor each side uses. “Respect is earned” and “everyone deserves basic respect” are two different economies of respect.
Respect as light and example
| Metaphor | Meaning | Example |
|---|---|---|
| a shining example | someone whose behaviour others should copy | Her honesty is a shining example to the whole team. |
| a beacon | a person or place that guides and inspires | The clinic is a beacon for families who have nowhere else to go. |
| a pillar of the community | a respected, reliable member who holds things up | The baker was a pillar of the community for forty years. |
| a household name | so respected or famous that everyone knows them | Within a decade she was a household name. |
“A pillar of the community” mixes two images: a pillar is tall and also carries weight. It is warm and a little old-fashioned, and often appears in obituaries and local news.
Similes about respect
Respect is more often described with metaphors than similes, but a few comparisons are common:
- “The crowd fell silent, as if a king had walked in.”
- “They treated the old fisherman like royalty.”
- “She was treated like part of the furniture” (the opposite: ignored, given no respect).
- “He was spoken of like a legend.”
Using respect metaphors in writing
- In a tribute or eulogy, “a giant”, “big shoes to fill” and “stand on the shoulders of giants” are warm and fitting.
- In a reference letter, “held in high regard” and “her opinion carries weight” sound professional.
- In casual praise, “hats off to you” is friendly and quick.
- Avoid mixing images: “She towered above her peers and carried a lot of weight on her pedestal” piles three pictures into a heap.
If you want to tell someone you accept their choice, other ways to say “I respect your decision” covers that. For related images, see metaphors for power and metaphors for justice.
Practice
- She’s the person I most admire. I really ______ her. (look up to / keep at arm’s length)
- His advice ______ because he has run three companies. (carries weight / gives a wide berth)
- ______ to the cleaning crew; the hall looks spotless. (Hats off / Bend the knee)
- After the scandal, the actor’s ______ was complete. (fall from grace / high regard)
- We went to the family home to ______. (pay our respects / take a bow)
- The retiring surgeon leaves ______. (big shoes to fill / a tarnished reputation)
Answers
- look up to
- carries weight
- Hats off
- fall from grace
- pay our respects
- big shoes to fill
Quick answers
What is a metaphor for respect?
“Look up to someone”, “carry weight”, “put someone on a pedestal” and “hats off to” are the most common.
Is “look up to” a metaphor?
Yes. You don’t literally raise your eyes; height stands for admiration. It is so common that most people no longer notice the image.
What does “on a pedestal” mean?
Admired so much that people overlook your faults. It often hints that the admiration is unrealistic.
What is the opposite of “look up to”?
“Look down on” or, more strongly, “look down your nose at”. Both mean treating someone as inferior. “Hold in contempt” is the formal equivalent.
What is a metaphor for self-respect?
“Stand tall”, “hold your head high” and “keep your dignity intact” all describe respecting yourself, especially in difficult moments.
What does “pay your respects” mean?
To honour someone, today usually a person who has died, by attending a funeral or visiting the family.